Walk down the feminine hygiene aisle and you'll find washes, wipes, deodorant sprays, douches, powders and pH-balancing foams. It's a large and profitable category built on a premise that isn't true: that your body is unclean by default and needs correcting.
The reality is closer to the opposite. Most vulvar irritation that women bring to a doctor turns out to be caused by the products bought to prevent it.
Here's what this part of your body actually needs, which is considerably less than you've been sold.
First, the vocabulary
These two words get used interchangeably and shouldn't be.
The vulva is everything external: the mons, the outer and inner labia, the clitoris and its hood, the vestibule, and the openings of the urethra and vagina. It's skin. You can see it, and you can wash it.
The vagina is the internal muscular canal. It's mucous membrane, not skin, and it is not somewhere anything needs to be cleaned.
Almost every hygiene mistake comes from applying vulva logic to the vagina, or from treating vulvar skin as though it were as robust as the skin on your arm. It isn't — the outer barrier layer is thinner and more permeable, which is why it reacts to things your forearm would shrug off.
The pH your body is quietly protecting
A healthy premenopausal vagina sits between roughly pH 3.8 and 4.5. That's genuinely acidic, and it isn't an accident.
Lactobacilli — the dominant bacteria in most healthy vaginal microbiomes — produce lactic acid, and that acidity suppresses the organisms that cause bacterial vaginosis and other infections. It's a self-maintaining defence system, and the discharge you see is part of how it works: it's the mechanism by which the vagina cleans itself, carrying cells and bacteria outward.
Vulvar skin is different, sitting closer to pH 5.5. That's why a product formulated for one isn't necessarily right for the other, and why anything you introduce internally has a good chance of doing more harm than good.
Vaginal pH naturally rises during your period, after sex, and after menopause when falling oestrogen reduces lactobacilli populations. That last shift is why infections and irritation become more common later in life — our menopause and sex guide covers what to do about it.
What to wash with
Warm water, once a day, on the vulva only. That's the whole protocol.
If you want more than that, use a small amount of a fragrance-free, gentle cleanser on the outer labia and rinse well. Look for something unscented and mild rather than something marketed as an intimate wash — the marketing costs more and often includes fragrance, which is the main thing you're trying to avoid.
A few specifics:
- Separate the outer labia gently and rinse between the folds, where sweat and residue collect.
- Nothing goes inside. Ever.
- Pat dry rather than rubbing.
- Wipe front to back, every time, for the reasons covered in our guide to UTI prevention.
- Skip the loofah and the washcloth. Hands are gentler and don't harbour bacteria between uses.
The products that make things worse
Douching
The most clearly harmful item in the category. Douching flushes out protective lactobacilli along with everything else and is associated with higher rates of bacterial vaginosis, pelvic inflammatory disease and other complications. Major gynaecological bodies advise against it outright. If you have an odour you're trying to wash away, douching will typically make it worse within days, because you've removed the bacteria that were keeping the odour-producing ones in check.
Vaginal steaming
No evidence of benefit and a documented burn risk. The vagina is not a surface that needs opening, and steam does not detoxify anything.
Scented everything
Wipes, sprays, deodorants, scented pads and tampons, bubble bath, bath bombs. Fragrance is the leading cause of contact dermatitis on vulvar skin. If you have persistent itching with no infection found, fragrance is the first thing to eliminate.
Daily panty liners
Worn continuously, they trap moisture and heat and can chafe. For heavy discharge days they're fine. As a daily habit they create the conditions they're meant to manage.
Underwear, laundry, and hair
- Cotton gusset. Synthetics hold moisture. Cotton breathes.
- Change out of wet things. Swimsuits and workout leggings sitting damp for hours are a reliable route to irritation.
- Sleep without underwear if you can. Eight hours of airflow makes a real difference for anyone prone to recurring issues.
- Fragrance-free detergent, no fabric softener, no dryer sheets. Softener residue sits against skin all day. This is a commonly missed cause of stubborn itching.
- Hair removal is cosmetic, not hygienic. Pubic hair is not dirty and removing it does not make you cleaner. Shaving causes ingrown hairs and folliculitis; waxing creates microtears. If you groom, do it because you prefer it, and give skin a day or two before sex.
What normal discharge looks like
Discharge changes across your cycle, and most women were never told what the pattern should be.
- Just after your period: minimal, sometimes dry.
- Building toward ovulation: increasing, creamy, white.
- Around ovulation: clear, stretchy, similar to raw egg white.
- After ovulation: thicker, whiter, less of it.
Healthy discharge is clear to white or off-white, may dry slightly yellow on underwear, and has a mild scent that is not neutral. Every vulva has a smell. That is normal and not something to correct.
Irritation or infection?
Worth getting looked at:
- Thin grey or white discharge with a strong fishy odour, often more noticeable after sex — the classic pattern for bacterial vaginosis.
- Thick white discharge with intense itching and soreness — typically a yeast infection.
- Green, yellow or frothy discharge with odour — needs testing.
- Any sore, ulcer, lump or new lesion.
- Persistent itching with no discharge, particularly with skin that looks pale, thin or shiny. This can be lichen sclerosus, a treatable inflammatory skin condition that is frequently missed for years and does need proper diagnosis.
- Burning, splitting or tearing during sex, which points toward dryness or tissue changes rather than infection. Our guides to vaginal dryness and pain during sex cover this.
One practical warning: repeatedly self-treating with over-the-counter thrush products is a common way to prolong a problem that was never yeast to begin with. If a treatment doesn't resolve it, get a diagnosis rather than buying a second box. Recurrent irritation can also be driven by low-grade chronic inflammation, which we cover in our guide to inflammation and intimacy.
How this connects to comfortable sex
Irritated skin is not skin that enjoys friction. A lot of what gets labelled low desire is actually a body that has learned to associate sex with stinging afterwards.
Two things help more than anything else. Strip your routine back to water and fragrance-free products for a month and see what changes. And choose intimate products with the same scrutiny you'd apply to face cream — our guide to choosing a lubricant explains which ingredients irritate and why. Soothe Intimate Relief Oil was formulated with sensitive skin as the starting point rather than an afterthought.
If pain persists once irritants are removed, the cause is likely muscular or hormonal rather than dermatological — our guide to the pelvic floor and sex is the next place to look.
Frequently asked questions
Should I use a pH-balancing wash?
On the vulva, a fragrance-free cleanser around pH 5.5 is reasonable if you want to use something. Internally, no product is needed — the vagina regulates its own pH, and washes designed to adjust it interfere with a system that works.
Is it normal for my vulva to have a smell?
Yes. A mild, musky scent that shifts across your cycle is entirely normal. What warrants attention is a strong fishy odour, a sudden change, or a smell accompanied by itching or unusual discharge.
Can I use body wash down there?
On the outer vulva, a small amount of something gentle and unscented is fine. Most body washes are more alkaline and heavily fragranced than vulvar skin tolerates well, so plain water is the safer default.
Does removing pubic hair reduce infections?
No. There's no evidence that removal improves hygiene, and grooming carries a small risk of cuts, folliculitis and ingrown hairs. It's a purely aesthetic choice.
Why do I keep getting irritated after sex?
The usual suspects are friction from insufficient lubrication, an ingredient in the lubricant or condom, a latex sensitivity, or a reaction to a partner's products. Change one variable at a time. If it persists across all of them, see a clinician.
The takeaway
Your vulva needs warm water, breathable fabric, and to be left alone. The vagina needs nothing at all.
Most of what's sold in that aisle solves a manufactured problem and creates a real one. Strip the routine back, learn what your normal actually looks like across a month, and take persistent symptoms to someone who can diagnose rather than to another product.
This article is for general information and is not medical advice. Speak to a qualified healthcare provider about symptoms specific to you.